LTP 28- Mastering Your Marriage Pt3- Couples That Play Together Stay Together

In this podcast Episode, David & Caron Loveless discuss how to move the needle on the fun meter in your marriage.

We know that every personality needs to have their own version of fun. While some are natural at this and others need to work at it more, apparently, we are genetically designed for fun and novelty.

Listen to the Audio

Here is a brief summary of today’s episode of “The Live True Podcast.”  You can use this as a reference or reminder of key things you feel like you need to pay attention to or pass on to others, in the next 7 days of your life.

Research from the University of Denver supports a high correlation between fun and marital happiness. They found that the amount of fun couples have together was the strongest factor in overall marital happiness.

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Serious adult responsibilities like careers, child raising, caring for elderly parents, household chores community & church commitments are all great but after years of managing our to -do lists, it can get easier and easier to let the fun slide and to think of fun together as a luxury, even trivial.

It’s crazy that FUN is the most easily satisfied in marriage

but sometimes the hardest to come by.

Listen to rest of this very fun podcast, by clicking on the “play” button, as we discuss the raising the value of fun in our own marriage and multiple ways that we’re doing this today.

 

Ask Us a Question

If you have a question, comment, or thought to share with us,  we’d love to hear from you.  Simply click here: “COMMUNICATE w/ David & Caron.

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50 Ways To Keep Your Marriage Fun

One of the first things that drew me to my husband was his sense of humor. The guy was a blast to be with. I never laughed so much in my life. But the longer we were married, the more kids we had and the more pressures we experienced leading a large church, the more our serious adult responsibilities seemed to be squeezing the fun out of us.

We still had our lighter moments, but that constant, easy, light-hearted laughter that had once been a staple of our relationship kept getting harder and harder to come by. Maybe you can relate.

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Research from the University of Denver supports a high correlation between fun and marital happiness.

They found the amount of fun couples have together was

the strongest factor in overall marital happiness.

Another study by colleagues at State University of New York-Stoney Brook showed that sharing new and exciting activities consistently contributes to better relationships. They found that people in happy relationships plan fun activities and that fun keeps the relationship strong and fresh.

We get how easy it is to slip into a rut doing the same things, going to the same places but over time that sucks the life out of a vibrant relationship.

LTP 25- Rethinking The Glorification Of Busy

In this podcast Episode, David & Caron Loveless discuss how to Rethink The Glorification of Busy.

The busyness of our lives has led to unprecedented levels of exhaustion, stress, and vulnerability. Conventional wisdom tells us to the key to sanity is changing or better managing the external chaos of life. But transformative wisdom tells us that our internal chaos is ALWAYS the key to changing our external chaos.

Listen to the Audio.  Click the play button.

Here is a brief summary of today’s episode of “The Live True Podcast.”  You can use this as a reference or reminder of key things you feel like you need to pay attention to or pass on to others, in the next 7 days of your life.

The typical conversation these days always start with the same question: “How are you doing?” And the standard answer is usually: “Busy… tired… exhausted.”

Can this be different?  Should it be different?

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Busyness and exhaustion seems to be the new merit badge of acceptance these days.

Here are three take-away’s you’ll find in listening to the audio portion of today’s podcast:

LTP 19- Seeing Your True & False Self In Action

In this podcast Episode, we discuss how to observe both your true and false self in action.

In our new book, Nothing To Prove, we unpack a framework of 3 steps, that we use daily in order to see progressive levels of growth and transformation in our lives.

#1) Pinpoint what drives your compulsive identity

#2) Plant yourself in the Source of your true Identity

#3) Participate in practices to help anchor you at the core of your true identity  

So as you listen to this podcast, hear the simple and yet varied ways you can begin to pinpoint, plant and then participate in your true identity.

Listen to the Audio

Here is a brief summary of today’s episode of “The Live True Podcast.”  You can use this as a reference or reminder of key things you feel like you need to pay attention to or pass on to others, in the next 7 days of your life.

Self awareness is an essential key that opens the door to patterns of living and being that are actually sabotaging your life.  It is also a way that you can begin to live further into the life you actually yearn for.  

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We’ve created a chart that will help you identify which “identity lens” you are viewing your life through at any given time.

These comparisons can be used as a spiritual practice. Each day or 2-3 times a week,  spend a few minutes to take snap shots of which identity that you are living out of.

Here are just a few of them.  (* By the way, this isn’t intended for you to be harsh or critical with yourself or others, but to increase your self- awareness.)

A Proven Framework For Personal Transformation

We have always been the kind of people who were zealous to grow and gain mastery in our attitudes, actions and relationships. We kept the latest books on our nightstand, in our brief case and on our Kindle.

You could find us perched on the front row at cutting-edge seminars eager to take copious notes. And we set regular times to pour over scripture and pray (and, sometimes, fast) all in an earnest search for personal improvement, spiritual progress, vocational success and relational harmony.

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You may have done a few of those things yourself. 

Sometimes, the solutions we found worked for awhile. We’d get breakthroughs, gain some new insight.

Then stuff would come up.

And the same old glitches would surface internally, vocationally or relationally. And off we’d go again in search of a better way.

Then, finally, after a lot of years of trial and error in leadership, love, and life we landed on what, for us, has turned out to be a proven framework for lasting personal transformation.

LTP 17- The Root of Your Stress Is Not ‘Out There’

How your thoughts & feelings of unworthiness feed your stress

In this podcast Episode 17, David & Caron Loveless discuss how to discover a primary root of your stress is not ‘out there’ but ‘in here.’

Most of us think that our stress comes from somewhere outside ourselves, and sometimes that’s true.  But more often than not, we are stressing ourselves out from the inside by our own thoughts and feelings of unworthiness.

Listen to the Audio

Here is a brief summary of today’s episode of “The Live True Podcast.”  You can use this as a reference or reminder of key things you feel like you need to pay attention to or pass on to others, in the next 7 days of your life.

Earlier this week we wrote a blog on 17 ways the need for approval is stressing you out.  We promised a further conversation around this in todays podcast.

Everyone likes to feel approved, get praised for a job well done or be on the receiving end of a sincere compliment. Where approval goes wrong is when we do or say things, often unconsciously, to gain admiration or applause in order to cover some sense of unworthiness or insufficiency.

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Without realizing it, the need to feel admired or liked can add boatloads of stress to our already maxed out life.

Listen to the podcast as we discuss in detail (as opposed to just the bulleted points in this weeks blog) the 17 signs your drive to feel validated and gain approval could be stressing you out.

Here is a review of those signs:

* You often talk up your accomplishments or connections so others will know how well you’ve done or are doing

* You position yourself or the work you do in a slightly better light than is actually true.

* You downplay your mistakes so that others won’t think less of you.  

* You “one-up” others in conversations, in meetings or when people are swapping stories. You try to top whatever someone else says or has done. 

* You are highly competitive. Winning is everything. Failure is not an option. 

* It’s hard for you to say no. 

* You volunteer a lot, or constantly work overtime to please the boss. 

* You are the responsible one in the family–everyone depends on you to come through. 

* You feel resentful that others don’t notice all the good things you do for them.

* You constantly check social media for “likes” on your latest posts 

* You can’t decide what to wear, you change your clothes two or three times before leaving the house. You over-focus on your appearance, your fitness, your weight, teeth-whitening, your sex appeal. The mirror is your best & worst friend.

* You feel envious of others who look good, get ahead, or get special recognition

* You are a perfectionist- and proud of it. 

* You obsess about a failure or mistake and you worry about how it makes you look or what others think about you. 

* You are afraid to disappoint people and do just about anything to avoid their disapproval

* You feel uncomfortable or sad if someone does not like you or if they seem to avoid you or have shunned you. 

* You appear strong outside but inside you feel there’s something missing- like you are not  “enough.” 

A significant way of overcoming the need to do any or all the above is staying grounded at our core, to the truth that we are fixed for life in Deepest Love.

This is something we often remind ourselves of. It easily evaporates with all the competing influences of our lives. Maybe that’s why Jesus spends all of John 15 emphasizing abiding in him and his love. It’s significant that one of the last things he asks of his disciples is to, “ Remain in my love.”  (John 15:9)

You must always come back to this… and be daily aware of this: at your core, you are already good. God declares that in Genesis 1. You were good long before you did anything, and are good after everything you’ve done is then gone.

If you want to reduce your stress, experience more peace, plus build more resiliency at work and in your relationships, become more aware of some of the things you do and say to try to gain approval. This is a great step toward growing stronger levels of self-clarity and emotional health. 

Two Resources That Can Help 

1. In our new book  Nothing to Prove: Find the Significance & Satisfaction You’ve Been Striving for at the Core of Your TrueIdentity one of things we candidly talk about is our own issues with approval and how you, too, can overcome the driving compulsion to be known, feel more important and special.

The soft cover & audio versions of the book are available on Feb 16th! To reserve your copy click HERE.  

!!! Important Announcement: our FREE online class goes live next week

2.  We’re about to launch a FREE online class called:  “Stop Striving and Start Enjoying the Life God Made You to Live.”It’s consists of 3 short video lessons that share priceless lessons we’ve learned that can help you significantly reduce feeling stressed, stuck or stale in any area and start experiencing the ultimate life God made you to live.

To Sign Up NOW for Our FREE online class click HERE.

To find out more, listen to this podcast in its entirety by clicking on the play button.

Ask Us a Question

If you have a question, comment, or thought to share with us,  we’d love to hear from you.  Simply click here: “COMMUNICATE w/ David & Caron.

Subscribe to & Share the Podcast

If you have enjoyed this podcast, you can subscribe by clicking on one of the below buttons:

Click Here to Subscribe via iTunes

Click Here to Subscribe via Stitcher (great Android users or listening on the web)

Click Here to Subscribe via RSS (non-iTunes feed)

If this podcast has been helpful & you’re thinking of someone else you know that could benefit from it, then click on any of the ‘Share’ buttons below or the one’s located at the top of this post.

17 Signs The Need for Approval Is Stressing You Out

Everyone likes to feel approved, get praised for a job well done or be on the receiving end of a sincere compliment. Where approval goes wrong is when we do or say things, often unconsciously, to gain admiration or applause in order to cover some sense of unworthiness or insufficiency.

Without realizing it, the need to feel admired or liked can add boatloads of stress to our already maxed out life.

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Here are 17 signs your drive to feel validated and gain approval could be stressing you out:

* You often talk up your accomplishments or connections so others will know how well you’ve done or are doing

* You position yourself or the work you do in a slightly better light than is actually true.

* You downplay your mistakes so that others won’t think less of you.  

LTP 15- When Enough Is Never Enough

In this podcast Episode, David & Caron Loveless discuss “When Enough Is Never Enough.” Many of us are always trying to achieve and accomplish more. There is great value in this and then there can emerge a dark side to it.

To listen to the audio of this podcast, push the above play arrow.

Here is a brief summary of today’s episode of “The Live True Podcast.”  You can use this as a reference or reminder of key things you feel like you need to pay attention to or pass on to others, in the next 7 days of your life.

Earlier this week, I wrote a blog on leadership and the cost of a national championship.  At the end of it, I promised you a more in-depth discussion on the subject.

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The Story of Urban Meyer and the parallel story of David Loveless is described in this podcast.

We’ve come to realize that the majority of the stress we’ve carried over the years, was completely of our own making. We had a significant hidden ‘driver’ inside. We needed to prove that those who believed in us were right… and those we perceived didn’t believe in us, were wrong.

Here are three observations we’ve made, when it seems like there is so much to do… and so little time… and enough never seems to be enough.

What’s the Cost of Winning?



In the aftermath of last nights National Championship football game, it’s easy to get caught up in the celebration of winning. The celebration of accomplishment. We celebrate the sacrifices of hard work by individuals given to reaching their goal of being called The Best.

In my personal journey, I discovered a little while back that Coach Urban Meyer of Ohio State and I have a a lot in common. Hear me out on this… We both love football and are high-octane achievers. Maybe you are the same. However, we also share this similarity:  We’ve both paid a heavy price for our compulsive obsessions to win. That’s something I hope you don’t have in common with us.

With that in mind, I wanted to share some lessons I’ve learned about the “cost” of winning. Because while I reveled in the celebration of accomplishment like so many others, I was unknowingly setting myself up for disaster. Coach Meyer did the same. If you are a leader or consider yourself to be a high-achiever (or desire to be), I ask that you take a few minutes and consider the lessons both Coach Meyer and I learned. Doing so may prevent you from paying the high cost of winning by showing you a new way to succeed.

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LTP 11- How To Curb Christmas Crazy

In this podcast Episode 11, David & Caron Loveless discuss how you can curb the Christmas crazy in your life with 10 simple guidelines.

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Here is a brief summary of today’s episode of “The Live True Podcast.”  You can use this as a reference or reminder of key things you feel like you need to pay attention to or pass on to others, in the next 7 days of your life.

 1.  I will let this year stand on its own. I will try not to compare it to other years when people were more … This year has it’s own gift for me and mine and I will receive it as it is without judging it by other years.