The other day I was heading into a public restroom, and I glanced down the hall to see a woman having one of those moments we pray never happen to us. Apparently, during the goings on of her visit to the ladies room she had inadvertently tucked the back of her dress into the top of her underwear.
I had a split second to decide if I would embarrass her by letting her know that a whole lot more than her slip was showing or have her risk the possibility of an even more devastating reveal to unsuspecting co-workers. I quickly got her attention and with a simple hand gesture let her know that her back door was open. From the other end of the hall, she yelled, “Oh my gosh!
We’ve all had moments or days or seasons when we’ve wanted to crawl under the table for one reason or another:
- Getting a speeding ticket on a busy highway
- Someone making a crack about your passport photo
- Filing for bankruptcy
- Getting called into the boss’ office for a reprimand
- Slipping on wet pavement in front of a crowd of people
- Losing an important client or competition
- Being dunked on during a basketball game
- Being turned down for a job or a date
- Going through a divorce
- Showing up underdressed at a formal event
- Putting your foot in your mouth
- Having to confess a serious mistake or failure
When we lose, mess up or think we look bad it feels rough, but it’s never the whole picture of who we are. If we stay awake, those unwanted but very human moments of humiliation can remind us that we are far more than our public image.
All I need is one humiliation a day to remind my ego that it’s not in charge and to keep me centered in who I am in God.
Richard Rohr
Our true self is actually the only thing we will ever possess that cannot be shaken, embarrassed, devastated or destroyed. When all else fails it’s still alive.
A bad day for the ego is a good day for the soul.
Michael Beckwith
We love this quote and we cringe knowing, painfully, first hand how it feels to live this out. Our ego, our compulsive, false self is the part of us that must always be right, look good and be successful. And as a result, it’s also the part of us that feels shame.
No matter what’s happened our true self remains intact, unphased by failure, loss or human error because it is eternal.
The next time your ego gets bruised notice it, acknowledge it, but remind it that you are much more than the appearance of things. Even if a failure of yours failure goes viral, there is truth and comfort in knowing you can withstand that exposure because you are not your faults, and your failures are passing experiences. Let’s grow from our mistakes but not be defeated by them.
Written by Caron Loveless
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